Doctor Who Rewind - The Ark

It's full speed ahead now as I approach the final stories of Harntell's three year stint as the Doctor. And, for extra support on this four parter, I'm joined on the sofa by my four year old son, who is already completely potty about DW and has watched all the post 2005 episodes, the McGann TV Movie, a Davidson, a Tom Baker and Pertwee (in a Pear tree). Sorry, couldn't help myself.

In the very first scene we see the back of what appears to be Opra Winfrey on a particularly bad hair day. But wait, as it turns to face the camera it appears to be someone dressed in a badly fitting bear costume, wearing a very dodgy wig. Oh, and they appear to have misplaced an eye. Probably came off in the wash I should imagine.

This hideous creature then is a Monoid. I look over to Small Treadwell to see if there is any reaction to the monster. None. Mmmmmm.

We have travelled ten million years into the future to a space ship which contains a living zoo. A kind of Ark which contains examples of various life forms and plants from Earth. Humans (called Guardians) have fled Earth as it is about to be destroyed by the expanding sun.

These Guardians, live peacefully on the ship with the Monoids, who are their slaves. The Monoids have no mouth and only communicate via a weird set of hand signals. Half the time they look like they are doing hand motions to some kind of 1970's disco dance, and if they could only get their legs and feet doing the same, they would surely win dance off's around the galaxy.

The ship is on the way to a planet called Refusis II, which will be the humans new home. Many billions of humans have been miniaturised and put into storage until arrival on the planet. In fact at the start of the episode a sorry young fellow is sentenced to miniaturisation for having an inappropriate relationship.

Also, very importantly, the humans a erecting a giant statue on the ship, just for kicks apparently, of a human being. What they quite plan to do with this statue is anyone's guess.

Thrown into all this, the TARDIS crew are soon captured and taken to the control room for questioning. Dodo, the newest Doctor companion, has ransacked the TARDIS wardrobe and is wearing a medieval knights outfit and looks totally out of place. She has also come down with a cold and is sneezing all over the place.

The inevitable happens and the humans and Monoids start dropping down like flies from the virus, from which they have little immunity. When the commander is taken ill, Zentos, his deputy, who is highly suspicious of the Doctor, has them imprisoned.

After some persuasion, the Doctor is released and allowed to cure the virus from taking any more victims. The humans, being extremely glad about this, allow the Doctor and friends to leave and the TARDIS dematerialises.

It certainly seems, at this point, that things have gone a bit too well for the Doctor, and given we are only two episodes into a four parter we know there is more to come. When first shown in 1966 it must have been a bit confusing then to see the TARDIS landing in the same jungle as it had just left.

Time has moved on however and seven hundred years have paced. Things have changed on the ship. The Monoids are no longer mute slaves, due to a second strain of the cold virus affecting the humans enough to make them genetically inferior.

The tables have turned, the Monoids are now the masters of the humans, they are able to speak using a device placed around their neck, and to boot, they have mastered basic counting, as every Monoid is assigned a number of rank, with one as the leader.

The Doctor and co are sent to the security kitchen to work. No!!! Not the security kitchen I hear you cry!! Yes, they will make pies and pastries!!! Soups and salads! What a terrible existence.

The replacement Earth planet Refusis II is nearing, and the Doctor and Dodo are chosen as a first landing party to check out if there are any hostile inhabitants.

Turns out that Refusis II is home to invisible creatures with huge strength, who are only willing to share the planet with peace keeping beings. They are however, willing to help the Doctor.

Meanwhile Monoid number one has fallen out with Monoid number four about what to do with the humans after settling on Refusis II. One wants to kill them and has planted a bomb inside the huge statue on the space ship, which if you remember, was going to be a humanoid, but has in fact become a Monoid.

While civil breaks out between the two fractions of the Monoids as they land on Refusis II. Monoids go mono on mono with Monoids and there's plenty of casualties.

Steven manages to break out of the Kitchen and joins the search for the bomb, however a Refusian has snuck aboard a Monoid ship and has found the bomb itself, it is thrown out the air lock and into space before it explodes.

The story concludes with the humans and remaining Monoids agreeing to live on equal terms with the Refusians.

Back on the TARDIS after dematerialisation, the Doctor starts fading in and out strangely?

Despite this classic story being over 45 years old, the restoration team have again done a fine job of cleaning it up. And the scenes on film look pretty atmospheric and cinematic. The sets are good too with the forest and animals, even including an elephant.

The only thing that let's this story down is the Monoids themselves who just end up looking like men in hairy suits with wigs on.

Next time on Doctor Who Rewind we enter the realm of The Celestial Toymaker.